Scott Couey

WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group sent me a complimentary copy of this book for my review.

How can a true warrior be tender?

When you hear the words “tender” and “warrior” together, it paints an interesting picture. How can a warrior truly be a warrior and be tender? Stu Weber’s 1993 (published again in 1999) book Tender Warrior seeks to inform the reader what it means to be a real man. In a society where it is the norm for children to not know their father, Weber is one who challenges the male population to stand up and be men. Using stories straight from scripture (including David, Jonathan, Caleb, Joshua, and Jesus), the reader is shown that being a true man is not defined by society. The ultimate “measuring stick” of a man should be Jesus, and not the picture the world has painted of Him – the true version that comes straight from the scriptures in the Bible.

The book contains sixteen chapters dealing with topics including the relationship between a husband and his wife, the relationship between a man and his children, being a leader, the tender side of being a man, a man and his friends, and a man’s relationship with his Savior. It is an easy read and even has questions after each chapter that would be suitable for a men’s small group study to use while reading the book.

Here are a few takeaways I got from Tender Warrior:

• Being a male doesn’t necessarily make you a man.
• Real men conquer for a cause.
• Masculinity was made for connection.
• Real men should be pro-visionaries. They plan ahead to set the standard.
• A true man is called to be a king, warrior, mentor, and friend just like Jesus.

There were only three things I didn’t really like about the book: 1) The majority of the book was written for married men (especially men with children), but there was something in it for men of all stages in life. 2) Numerous times Weber’s illustrations seemed dated (he constantly used an illustration about a western television show he used to watch in the 1960s). 3) At times the author seemed to ramble a little. Some of the chapters could have easily been combined if he had cut back on some of the illustrations and just gotten straight to the point.

As a whole, I would highly recommend this book to any male who would like to make sure he is on the path to being a real man. For those who are interested, you can read the first chapter of Tender Warrior online.

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