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Big Brother – A Dissection of (Not So) Good Community
Looking for "true community?" Watch reality tv shows like Big Brother and do the opposite!
The subject of “community” has been on my radar lately. A couple of weeks ago, the sermon at church was on community. I am also starting two new community groups – one that I will be leading and another in which I am participating (a mentoring group for community group leaders). When I look up community in the dictionary, four of the definitions really stick out to me:
- “A social group of any size whose members reside in a specific locality, share government, and often have a common cultural and historical heritage.”
- “A social, religious, occupational, or other group sharing common characteristics or interests and perceived or perceiving itself as distinct in some respect from the larger society within which it exists (usually preceded by the): the business community; the community of scholars.”
- “A group of men or women leading a common life according to a rule.”
- “Similar character; agreement; identity: community of interests.”
One of my latest guilty pleasures is the reality television show Big Brother. If you’ve never watched the show, it’s basically a group of people whom have never met and they have to live in a house together under the watchful eye of “big brother” (the American public). Each week there is a competition that determines who becomes the “head of household” and that person has to nominate two other residents to be considered for eviction. Residents then compete in another competition for “power of veto” and whomever wins this competition is able to veto one of the nominations or keep them as is. At the end of the week, all house guests must vote to evict one of the people who ends up on the chopping block. Once the competition is down to two people, the previous eliminated house guests vote on which of the remaining two will receive an enormous amount of money.
Needless to say, this show is a VERY bad example of how a community should be:
- Individuals on the show form alliances against one another – in community you must be willing to work together as one unit.
- There is a lot of back-stabbing that occurs on Big Brother – members of community should not turn on each other.
- Big Brother contestants are caught frequently calling one another names – those involved in community should encourage one another and not embarrass or put down others in the group.
- Greed seems to be a common theme on Big Brother – those in community want to see everyone succeed in the group and actively celebrate those times with them.
If your “community” were to be filmed for a reality show, would it be like Big Brother?
Photo Credit: By Elaine Ashton
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“Every Single Man’s Battle” Has The Best Of Intentions
Photo Credit: By Christianbook.com
About a year ago, I read “Every Man’s Battle” by Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker with Mike Yorkey. I read the book with six other guys in a single men’s small group through my church. The overall message was much appreciated, but we found out the book was geared more toward married men. When I found out about “Every Single Man’s Battle” (by the same authors) I was very excited, that was until I actually read the book. To my dismay, I was disappointed for a few reasons.
- “Every Single Man’s Battle” constantly refers to “Every Man’s Battle.” What gets me is there wasn’t a whole lot of information from that book that was geared toward single men. They should have just taken what little information that was for single men in “Every Man’s Battle” and just put the information in “Every Single Man’s Battle” instead of saying “read chapters 1-5 of Every Man’s Battle.” It’s like the sole purpose they did this was to sell more books and I have a big problem with that.
- The author’s writing style was a little bothersome as well. Everything was “you need to do…” or “you should…” which comes across as if the authors were not single men, but married men who are not currently experiencing the whole issues trying to be a sexually pure single adult male. I would have liked it a lot more if the authors changed the wording to “we as single Christian men should…” or “we should…” that way it doesn’t come across like the authors have no idea what single men are going through or like they don’t sympathize for them.
- This book is better suited as a small group study curriculum, otherwise it is a very difficult read.
The message of the book is a good one that is definitely needed for all single Christian men and I found several take away items including:
- “Actually, sexual impurity is a series of bad decisions on our part – as a result of immature character – and deliverance won’t deliver you into instant maturity. Character work needs to be done.”
- Our sexuality is not just about obeying God’s commands but also a way to honor our relationship with Him.
- “When you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.” – 1 Corinthians 10:13
- “Being about our Father’s business is our rite of passage into manhood.”
- Single men should not live alone, but have at least one male roommate to help provide accountability in the area of sexual temptation.
I definitely recommend this book (with the above disclaimers) and even though it is a challenge at times to abide by this, the long term rewards are well worth it.
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Strength
"HIS strength is perfect..."
At times it can be scary to have God reveal something to you. Maybe I should explain exactly what it is that I mean. Sunday of last week, the sermon at church was on having strength in your fears (from Rodney Anderson – select Part 2 at bottom). The rest of the week I had different things concerning “strength” stuck in my head. Two songs kept repeating in my head – one song by Chris Tomlin that says “strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord…” and Steven Curtis Chapman’s “His Strength Is Perfect.”
Later in the week I kept having these Bible verses that were stuck in my head:
1 Chronicles 16:11 – “Look to the LORD and his strength; seek his face always.”
Psalm 18:32 – “It is God who arms me with strength and keeps my way secure.”
Isaiah 12:2 – “Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The LORD, the LORD himself, is my strength and my defense ; he has become my salvation.”
Isaiah 40:29 – “He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.”
Isaiah 40:31 – “Those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”
The whole week I kept thinking “What is it with this strength theme in my life this week?!” Well, I found out on Friday…I lost my job. It’s weird when God prepares you for something that is about to happen (especially when you don’t know that it is coming).
Photo Credit: By Beverly & Pack
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Scott Couey 